Having a Hard Time Connecting in Therapy? Why You Might Benefit from Seeing a Black Therapist
Recent studies find Black Americans to be 20 percent more likely to deal with serious mental health issues than their White counterparts. Meanwhile, POC generally use mental health services far less often than White people. How can we explain this disconnect?
One possible option: Black and Brown therapists make up only four percent of the mental health workforce.
This is not to declare that only people of the same ethnicity or background can work together in counseling. Far from it. However, there is an obvious need for a client to be understood. If you’re going to share your deepest thoughts with someone, you want them to “get” you.
Why People of Color (POC) Struggle to Connect and Open Up With Non-POC Therapists
It should be uncontroversial to say that a therapist from your community is better positioned to understand and relate to the POC experience. To follow are just some of the reasons why seeing a non-POC therapist can make you feel isolated or misunderstood:
As skilled as they might be, they simply cannot identify with your experiences, e.g. micro-aggressions and discrimination
After performing a lifetime of code-switching, you may feel compelled to assimilate—even in your therapy session
You may have already lost trust in the system—including the medical system—and just can’t find ways to regain that belief
POC are often encouraged or coerced to not be assertive but you need that quality to thrive in therapy
You end up playing the role of teacher to guide your therapist on how to help you
How can you fully heal if your therapist cannot help you fully examine the life you’ve lived?
Sometimes, you just want to connect with someone who looks like you
Adding to the Stress and Distress…
With so few therapists of color available, you may find it to be daunting to search for one. Being Black is only one requirement. Thus, this search can take on a needle-in-the-haystack quality—leaving you exhausted and demoralized.
In addition, asking friends and family for references or ideas may not be a feasible option. It’s not unusual for counseling to be particularly stigmatized in the BIPOC community.
All of this can feel negative, but it is important to stay realistic. Why? Well, the effort is worth it. Your mental well-being is a major component of your overall satisfaction in life. Yes, there are systemic obstacles to navigate. No one needs to tell you this. But the outcomes can be life-altering in the best possible way.
The Benefits of Seeing a Black Therapist
We could very well sum up this section by saying: It’s the opposite of what was just described above! It’s not quite so simple but there’s plenty of truth in that statement. Every therapy client shares a need to feel safe, to be heard and validated.
You want to be taken seriously. You want your problems to be taken seriously. From there, you want to feel like you and your therapist are collaborating in the name of your recovery. This is a delicate balance under any circumstances.
To find this balance in a world of racial inequity is a tall order. It requires you to reconcile events and experiences that you may prefer to forget. You can feel far less vulnerable detailing your past when, as stated above, the person sitting across from you looks like you. Even more so, they can relate to the general concepts you’re discussing.
No therapist should ever be expected to 100 percent relate to everything a client says. But wouldn’t it be amazing to connect with each other on a deeper and more meaningful level?